


Usuk Ridiculous Prompts

by peeka_boo



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Demon Summoning, Humor, Implied USUK - Freeform, M/M, Short Drabble, Swearing, USUK - Freeform, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-13
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-22 03:38:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8271229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peeka_boo/pseuds/peeka_boo
Summary: You don't have to ship USUK, but in this piece, it's merely impliedArthur was attempting another demon summoning, but thanks to Alfred, things got out of hand quickly and easily....





	1. This is the tenth demon summoning this week holy sh*t!

**Author's Note:**

> You don't have to ship USUK, but in this piece, it's merely implied  
> Arthur was attempting another demon summoning, but thanks to Alfred, things got out of hand quickly and easily....

“Oh my fucking god, England, What the ever loving fuck is that thing?!?!?!” 

After walking in on England’s magic room, America is now faced with a large, shadowy creature thing, but whatever the hell it was; it was scary, frightening, and radiated an aura that just felt like impending doom. All because he wanted to ask him where the bathroom was!

“The hell…”

“Shhhhhhhhhh, America, you idiot!” England loudly hushed him from behind a table holding supposedly magical items, “If it touches you, then something really bad will probably happen.”

Trying to lose the creature-thing’s eyes on him, America whisper shouted back to England “What do you mean… probably?”

“I meeeaaaannnnn”, He stressed out the words sarcastically despite their situation, “It’s a new spell so basically anything can happen you dolt!” “Now help me contain it or humanity’s doomed!” He said as he tossed what appeared to be a wand at America. “Distract it while I see if I can find a spell to vanquish it.”

“Awesome, dude! Now listen here you monster of a – well, I can’t tell what you are – but prepare to be bombarded with my magical powers!” America yelled, waving the wand everywhere.

“Now begone evil being! Bibbity, Bobbity Boo!” 

“America you idiotic buffoon! That isn’t a spell you dolt,” England shouted, eyes breaking away from the spell book he was scanning, “Crap! Watch out Alfred!”

The monster’s eyes lit up to a brilliant neon green, aimed at America and prepared to fire deadly beams of total destruction. Too bad America didn’t notice until a beam of green was speeding towards his head.  
“Holy shiiiiiii….”

Just barely dodging the beam of light, it exploded behind him sending dust and smoke into the air  
“Dude, do you ever even clean this place?”

“I’m trying to save our lives here, haven’t I taught you about priorities?”

“Uh, either you didn’t, or I for.... crap!” Another explosion sounded, sending debris all over the place.

“Can you hurry it up there, Eyebrows?!?!?!”

“I’m trying you bloody wanker, have you no patience?”

“Uh, not when my life is on the lin…. Shit!”

Another explosion, and more debris and items flying everywhere, and America adding to the explosion with his fail attempt to wield the wand.

“I found the spell!”

“Finally dude, it’s about time, I think we’ve destroyed enough of your magic room”

“Oh shut up you!”

“Fine, just cast the freaking spell already before we go ka-boom and have to be scraped off of the walls!”

After England grabbed the wand away from America, he mumbled some words, and eventually, the monster-thing started dissolving and once it was completely gone, they both gave a sigh of relief.

“That is the tenth demon summoning this week holy shit!” 

“I’m sorry about that, but thanks for your help…. again”

“Are you serious? That was AWESOME!!!” America shouted, pumping his fists in the air, “Let’s do it again sometime!”

England gave a sigh of exasperation.

After a moment of silence America took a deep breath and asked nonchalantly, “Hey, England?” 

“What is it America?”

“I still need to go to the bathroom.” 

Finish.


	2. Who wouldn’t be angry, you ate all of my cereal and faked your death for three years!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alfred who had disappeared three years ago, now randomly appeared in Arthur's kitchen, and ate all his cereal..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Usuk fic based on a sentence prompt from: http://toxixpumpkin.tumblr.com/post/108022477839/ridiculous-sentence-prompts

It was morning in Arthur Kirkland’s house and he was making his way casually down the stairs, an already made cup of tea in one hand and the morning newspaper in the other.

He was currently wondering what he should have for breakfast, not really into the thought of cooking this early in the day, he decided that having a bowl of cereal was the easiest option. As he headed in the general direction of the kitchen, he was unaware that there was going to be a not-so-satisfying surprise at around 7 in the morning taking place soon.

“Yo! Good morning Eyebrows!”

An obnoxious familiar voice called out as Arthur entered the kitchen

A moment of silence was ensued as he looked at the scene in his kitchen, Alfred was sprawled out on the tiled floor chomping down on a bowl of cereal, the LAST bowl of cereal.

“What,” he paused for a bit, not quite believing his eyes, and examined the situation again, “thE BLOODY FUCKING HELL!”

Alfred was his friends, boyfriend, and lover, key word, WAS. Arthur had decided that their relationship was over when he got a letter in the mail containing their condolences for Alfred, who was pronounced deceased, the details of his untimely death were limited and vague.

“Yeah dude?” Alfred asked as he shoved another spoonful of cereal into his mouth, shifting into a more comfortable position as he looked up again, “something wrong?”

“I’LL TELL YOU WHAT’S WRONG YOU BLOODY WANKER” Arthur finally exploded, he was full on yelling at this point and he didn't give a fuck; he had carefully set down his newspaper and tea on the kitchen counter before he lost his mine and rage took over, “YOU HAD BEEN PRONOUNCED DEAD FOR THREE YEARS NOW, YOU JUST NOW SHOW UP IN MY HOUSE ON JUST SOME RANDOM MORNING, AND YOU FUCKING ATE THE LAST OF MY CEREAL!”

He was pretty sure his neighbors could hear his loud screeching, but at the moment, he didn’t care.

“Dude, chill out,” Alfred tried to explain but before he could finish a sentence, Arthur interrupted him,

“DON’T YOU DARE TELL ME TO ‘CHILL OUT’, I AM PLENTY CHILL YOU BLOODY ARSEHOLE!” He kept on screaming, even going as far as waving his hands and arms in the air to add extra effect, it also didn’t help that Alfred just sighed and nonchalantly kept eating his bowl of cereal, seemingly unconcerned about the furious Englishman yelling at him.

“C’mon man, you know I worked in the secret agents department of the government.”

“STILL NO EXCUSE, YOU COULD’VE AT LEAST CALLED”

“If I told anyone, I would’ve been dead!”

“I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!”

Alfred sighed as he set aside the now finished bowl of cereal, “this is going to be complicated….” He mumbled to himself, Arthur was quite hard to communicate with when he was angry, and this was the most rage he had expressed in a while.

He slowly got up off of the kitchen floor, cereal crumbs falling from his shirt.

“OH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW YOU DODGY GIT, ARE YOU GOING TO LEAVE AGA-“

He was never able to finish his sentence as just then and there, Alfred pulled him into a deep kiss. Despite trying to push himself away, Arthur remembered how he was never able to resist the American’s advances and melted into the kiss, though he would never admit to enjoying it…

One make-out session later, they finally separated, mouth sore, face flushed, and Alfred tried to explain again, “look Iggy,”

Despite all the events that had just happened, Arthur managed to scoff at the ridiculous nickname. 

Alfred ignored it and pulled him in an embrace, laying his head on Arthur's and closing his eyes before continuing.

“I was sent on a secret assignment in Russia, I can’t exactly tell you the details of the mission or the government would have my head, again, but just know that I was totally against the ‘telling everyone I had ever associated with that I had died in a tragic accident plan’ but it was decided to be the safest option by Mr. Boss-man himself."

Arthur was silent for a moment before tightening his grip on the his boyfriend, a couple of delayed tears leaking from the corners of his eyes, wetting where he was hiding his face in Alfred's rumpled shirt. 

“I-I guess I can understand that,” He mumbled into his shirt, all sources of anger finally gone, he was just happy to have his boyfriend back. Though he didn't like admitting his weaknesses, when news reached him that his beloved American was gone, he had been completely destroyed, holding onto the hope that he wasn't actually dead until the letter came that convinced him that his lover was never coming back, letting go of the little hope in Alfred's return. It was so relieving and heartwarming now that the American had come back to him, a small smile spread itself on his face. 

Alfred was slightly stunned as Arthur cried, but soon broke out in a huge grin accompanied by a couple tears of his own, “I knew you would get it Iggy!” And proceeded to pull Arthur into an apology make-out session.

“Though seriously dude, you didn’t have to freak out so epicly.”

“Well, who wouldn’t be angry, you ate all of my cereal and faked your death for three years!” Arthur argued in return, tears still streaming down his face, but a smile manifested itself on his lips.

A laugh was all he got out of the American as he captured his lips again in a passionate kiss.

Finish.


End file.
